Bullying in its various forms is becoming a more emerging issue in today's society that many children and teenagers are having to face daily at school or while practicing extracurriculars or even in their own homes. This problem is something that not all parents, teachers, administrators are even aware that it is occurring. Many people are convinced that bullying is only physical when in all reality, emotional bullying can do just as much damage as physical bullying can. There are many types of bullying including physical, verbal, social, and cyberbullying. With the way society is today and as much as we use the internet and social media, it is convenient for people to send a harmful message without even coming in contact with these individuals that they are bullying. This paper will present facts about bullying and its effect on youth, also providing signs of bullying and ways to stop it.
According to the National Centre Against Bullying, the formal definition of bullying is when an individual or a group of people with more power, repeatedly and intentionally cause hurt or harm to another person or group of people who feel helpless to respond. While this definition is broad, bullying incidents are not things such as single episodes of social rejection or dislike, single episode acts of nastiness or spite, random acts of aggression or intimidation, mutual arguments, disagreements or fights. These actions can cause feelings of hurt and hate though, they do not fit into the definition of bullying, and they're not examples of bullying unless they are being done deliberately and repeatedly.
As stated above there are many different types of bullying. Occurrences such as fights, damage of another's proper or even a single push on the playground is considered physical. Physical bullying is more likely to occur in the younger years because at that age children do not quite understand the language people are using to bully. Children are not normally exposed to that until the older years. Therefore to be mean to someone, they kick, pinch, hit, or push to prove there point per say. Physical bullying can cause both short term and long term damage. Along with physical bullying, there is verbal bullying which causes emotional damage to individuals. Verbal bullying includes name calling, insults, teasing, intimidation, homophobic or racist remarks, and verbal abuse. While verbal bullying can start off as harmless and innocent, it can escalate to levels which start affecting the individual worse than physical damage. Another type of bullying is social bullying which relates a lot to verbal bullying. Social bullying is designed to harm someone's social reputation. Social bullying includes lying and spreading rumours, negative facial or physical gestures, hateful looks, playing jokes to embarrass and humiliate someone, mimicking them in a negative way, encouraging others to exclude someone from the group. This type of bullying is done in order to damage someone's social reputation or social acceptance. Lastly we have cyberbullying which is known to be the most common in today's society. Cyberbullying by definition is overt or covert bullying behaviours using technologies, including hardware such as computers and smartphones, and software such as social media, instant messaging, texts, websites and other online platforms. Cyber bullying can happen at any given time and can be in public or private and sometimes only known to the person being bullied and the person bullying. Cyber bullying can include abusive or hurtful texts, emails or posts, images or videos, deliberately excluding others online, negative gossip or rumours, pretending to be others online or using their log-in information in order to bully them. Between all these various types of bullying, they are used everyday and this issue is hugely affecting our society.
Bullying has an affect on all involved, those who are bullied, those who bully, and those who witness bullying. Bullying is linked to many negative outcomes including impacts on mental health, substance use, and suicide. Individuals who are bullied can experience negative physical, school, and mental health issues and those who are bullied are more likely to experience depression, anxiety, feeling sad and lonely, change in sleeping and eating patterns, loss of involvement in everyday life activities. Bullying also affects your academics, when you are being bullied at school, you often choose not to go or you go and choose not to participate therefore affecting your grades. A very small number of bullied children might react with extremely violent measures. Statistics show that in twelve out of fifteen school shooting cases, the shooter had a history of being bullied. Often the individuals who bully others can also engage in violent behaviors into adulthood. Children who bully are more likely to abuse alcohol and drugs, get into fights, vandalize property, drop out of school, engage in early sexual activity, become criminals at an early age, be abusive in relationships such as marriage, girlfriends, their children, family members and so forth. Bystanders are the people who witness bullying and these individuals are more likely not to report it than to actually speak up. This is one of the main reasons that bullying fails to be solved because some would rather laugh at what is happening than help the person it is happening to.
Bullying can sometimes end with suicide. Suicide is something that no know wants to talk about or even address the fact that is exists. Our society is so accustomed to pushing things such as suicide into the pile of that things that occur but we choose not to talk about but in all reality it happens every single day. The statistics on bullying and suicide are alarming and shocking to know. Suicide is the third leading cause of death in young people, this results in about 4,400 deaths per year. For each suicide among young people, there are at least 100 suicide attempts. Over fourteen percent of high school students have considered suicide, and almost seven percent have attempted it and succeeded it. Think of all the individuals in your high school and just consider the fact that one of the people that you see everyday may commit suicide or maybe they have already tried. Also think about the fact that you or your classmates could be responsible for that individual wanting to commit suicide just because of something you say to them.
Previously said cyberbullying is the most common type of bullying in today's society. Over 80% of teens use a cell phone regularly making it the most common convenient way to bully others. With cyberbullying you are able to hide behind a screen unlike in real life when you are seen for who you are, behind a computer or a cell phone, you can be anyone you would like to be. Nearly 43% have reported be bullied online and in one out of four individuals, it has happened more than once. Only one in ten children report to a parent that they have been bullied online. Less than one in five cyberbullying incidents have been reported to the police. About half of all young individuals have been bullied online at least once while ten to twenty percent experience it regularly. With the information we have, we can draw that cyberbullying is the most common type of bullying but also it is the one that goes the least noticed and reported.
In states across the U.S. there are laws and policies that are anti-bullying. In all states, there are laws against bullying but in some states, there is a policy against anti-bullying. The laws cover bullying in schools and cyberbullying and the policy covers what exactly is considering bullying and what is not. Each state has a different way of addressing the bullying situation. North Carolina has a specific way of handling cases of bullying. The terms that are used in North Carolina when it comes to the anti-bullying and regulations are bullying or harassing behavior. These laws do cover cyberbullying unlike some states. North Carolina anti-bullying laws and regulations cover groups that include race, color, religion, ancestry, national origin, socioeconomic status, academic status, gender identity, physical appearance, sexual orientation, mental, physical, developmental or sensory disability. All schools that receive federal funding are required by law to address all cases of bullying and they are to be handled according to the laws for our state.
There are many signs of bullying each relating to the different types of bullying that individuals are experiencing. Physical signs of bullying are easier to see and to prove. Some of the physical signs of bullying are unexplained bruises, cuts, scratches, your child comes home with missing or damaged belongings or clothes or they come home hungry. Emotional bullying results in signs that are not as easy to notice. Some emotional and behavioural signs of bullying are, changes in sleep patterns, changes in eating patterns, frequent tears or anger, mood swings, feels ill in the morning, becomes withdrawn or starts stammering, becomes aggressive and unreasonable, refuses to talk about what is wrong, begins to target siblings, or continually 'loses' money or starts stealing. There are also many signs that bullying is occurring while at school. School signs of bullying are your child doesn't want to go to school, they change their route to school or are frightened of walking to school, doesn't want to go to school on the bus or grades begin to fall and your student begins to fail their classes. A few other signs of bullying are your child is often alone or excluded from groups or their friends at school, they become a frequent target for teasing, mimicking or ridicule at school and they are unable to speak up in class and appears insecure or frightened. Most individuals who are the victim in a bullying situation are afraid to speak up, that is why most cases go unknown and unsolved. Bystanders were discussed earlier in the paper and not only do the victims not speak up, neither do the bystanders in most cases. Not only do the children who are being bullied speak up to the bullies, they do not tell their parents or teachers in order for the bullying to stop. The victims are more than likely scared that speaking up will only make the situation worse for them.
A question the is often asked is how to stop the bullying. The first step is to try to get the victim, whether it be your child, student, or friend to open up about what's happening in their life by showing them that you understand, and won’t judge them. You need to listen to the whole story, do not interpret or shut them down because you will likely lose their trust. Being empathetic, calm and showing that you understand what they are saying is key to helping them cope and deal with their situation. Talking about what is going is also a huge part of helping the bullying situation, have a conversation about what is happening and how to solve it. A lot of the time this can be difficult because you have to try not to let your very emotions whether it be anger or sadness show. You showing your feelings can make it worse for the victim and maybe make them shut down. Maybe start by asking the child what they would like to happen and most of the time all they want to know is how to stop the bullying. You as the person that the victim has chosen to count on and help them, you need to find out what is happening You need to know when and where the bullying occurred, who was involved, how often and if anybody else witnessed it. Don't offer to confront the young person or their parents yourself because this may make things worse for this individual. If you are the parent and the bullying is occurring at school, you need to contact the school first before taking other steps. You also do not need to assume the school will know about the situation, because the child may not have told them or they may not have seen this occur. The majority of children and teenagers will not tell a teacher or a parent that bullying is happening to them because a lot of time when an adult gets involved and it is not handled properly, then it will make it worse for the victim. Be prepared when you are going to the school with the situation. Some things to do are to make an appointment with your child's teacher, check the school's bullying policy, take along your notes about the situation or screenshots, texts or anything you have to prove the bullying is happening, find out if the school is aware of the bullying, and ask what can be done in order to stop the bullying. You need to also give the individual some advice to help them like encourage them not to fight back, but help them to use certain responses and help them explore other possible responses. Some other useful advice includes telling them that the behaviour was intentional and it needs to be solved, explain it's safer to avoid situations that could put them in harm's way, don't allow them to stay home from school activities and help to make opportunities for them to join other groups like clubs or sports to get them out of the situation they are in. Stopping bullying is a difficult thing to do but just by taking charge and making the situation known, you are helping move towards solving the problem.
Bullying is something that is very difficult to understand. It is a pattern of harming and humiliating others, more specifically those who are in some way weaker or younger than the bully. Bullying is a deliberate and repeated attempt to cause harm to others and it is a behavioral style that bullies use to make themselves feel not necessarily better but feel a sense of power. Many studies show that bullies do not have a prosocial behavior and are unaffected by anxiety. They do not understand others feelings because more than likely, they are struggling with feelings of their own. Individuals who bully on a regular basis have negative relationships with parents and peers. Bullies cannot exist without victims and they do not pick on just anyone. They single out those who show fear even before a bully comes along. It is a difficult process to break a bully because previously said, the way they are acting stems from problems such as life at home or maybe the way they have been treated in the past. Bullying is a serious problem that we can work together to stop.