awards such as Guggenheim Fellowship and was rewarded to launch My Life in China. With that small budget, Eng made it work and flew with his father and a small crew to China, where he shot majority of his film. Making his documentary, particularly My Life in China, has had a resounding impact on him, gaining a deeper connection to his father and generating profound self-awareness.
Eng wanted to have the audience hear about his story growing up a first-generation Chinese American, and how it led to him becoming a documentary filmmaker who turned the lens on himself. Eng spoke about the father and son journey in the film and the impact of "transforming ourselves with art,” as said in the film. Majority of the film focused on the time he and his father had spent in China. It first began saying how his father had become bankrupt in America, and having deserted China years ago. His father would always tell him the story of how he walked for seven days and six nights, before swimming for four hours to Macau to escape communism in 1966. Eng’s father wanted to escape the past and to go towards freedom, a new beginning for only for himself but for his future generation. By returning to China with his father, Eng wanted viewers to be on the journey with him as his father recollected the struggle for a better life, and the choices he had made to ensure that happened. From escaping starvation to fighting for the American Dream, Eng wanted to show the viewers that the greatest success in life is giving into the lives of the next generation and providing opportunities that allow them to improve even if the sacrifices required result in little financial gain for yourself. His father shed some tears during the movie because of the struggle he had to face in the past Many of the moments he had interviewed his father was through childhood homes, streets, and neighborhoods that made him relive the past. One of the moments particularly during the film was when Eng interviewed his father in the old house in the village. It was the moment when he finally realized his father’s sacrifice was for him. There’s a depth of sadness that came with a man trying, and losing at “The American Dream.” Eng’s father felt he has failed, which touched Eng personally.
After the film was shown, the audience was able to ask questions about the movie or just about Eng’s life. At first, Eng wanted to thank audiences for letting him film this movie and being able to show it to the public. He wanted to send out a message to not only the younger generation but to many other families. There was a specific moment during Eng’s speech that made him cry. It was a moment of accomplishment for not only his film, but for helping his dad go back to his country. He explained how he was so thankful to have this opportunity with him, and how it allowed him to grow closer with his family. Though he told the audience that his father sadly passed away a few years after the film was released, there was not a single moment he regretted making the film. It was a movie to help spread awareness and love.
In America, everyone has a family story of immigration. Every family, at some point, has had somebody leave their native country behind to search for a better life. How did they hold onto their identity? How did they adapt to their new life? Every family has a special story. This particular film and the director connects to the themes of the course this semester because it was about finding our roots. Eng wanted the show people that in his case, it was his Chinese-American story. What is the definition of success? What does it mean to make a better life for your family? Does it come in riches and wealth, or in opportunities and the value of self-worth? Eng described to the audience that night of the viewing that growing up as a young person in Boston, he was often times embarrassed to be Chinese. Growing up in Boston, Eng explained how he was always embarrassed about who he was. He did not understand what it meant to be Chinese-American. He felt empty and unfulfilled disconnected from his family and friends. He felt invisible, like he didn’t exist. “Who am I?,” he asked himself to the audience. It was through the making of the film that he finally found myself. His goal was to have an understanding for the immigrant experience. In the outcome, Eng was extremely thankful to spend the precious time with his dad because he did not not know if he would ever get the chance again.
Eng’s talk on the importance on understanding his family history can relate to my life and personal experience. Growing up in a dominantly white neighborhood, I always had difficult life finding out who I was. I went to a Catholic school, majority of white students. Because of that, I had trouble finding friends or others who shared the same cultures or similarities as me. I also felt disconnected to my family because I did not know any history at all. My parents came from Hong Kong and they always told me they gave up their lives in Hong Kong to give me a better opportunity in America. I truly never understood that because I never understood their struggle back in their country. My mom would tell me her struggles of finding jobs in America when she came over and often times felt as if she had failed. Hearing Eng’s story made me understand more about my culture and my family’s struggle to help me get to where I am today. After watching Eng’s documentary, it made me proud of my parents for what they have sacrificed and have done for me to give me a better opportunity in America.