B. General statement (2 marks): Social networking addiction refers to someone who spends so much time using social networking sites such as Facebook, Twitter and other forms of social networking sites. Researchers at Chicago University states that regarding an experiment in which they recorded the longing of hundred people for few weeks, it is proved that social networking addiction is stronger compared to the addiction to cigarettes and alcohol.
C. Thesis statement (2 marks): Therefore, what are the causes on addiction to social networking and what are the consequences? The social networking addiction is caused by an emotional disturbance while the effect of a social networking addiction is wasting time and money.
II. Body
A. Topic sentence (2 marks): One of the causes of social networking addiction is an emotional disturbance.
1. Supporting point 1 (2 marks): People who have an emotional disturbance tend to feel upset, stressed, depressed, low-spirited, lonely and worried.
a. Sub-supporting point 1 (specific detail -3rd level) (2 marks): According to the University of Iowa, males between the ages of 20 to 30 years old who are suffering from depression is quite common to the internet addiction cases.
b. Sub-supporting point 2 (specific detail -3rd level) (2 marks): People who are suffering from depression and worried are obsessed to have a computer as it is the only way for them to turn to the internet to fill their need when they lack of emotional support.
2. Supporting point 2 (2 marks): People who suffer from emotional disturbance have no self-confident and it can lead to social withdrawal, feeling more ease on interacting with people online than in person.
a. Sub-supporting point 1 (specific detail -3rd level) (2 marks): The one who suffer from social anxiety and low self-esteem have a lot to gain from using social networking sites. (Guillermo, n.d)
i. Sub-sub-supporting point (specific detail -4th level) (2 marks): Individuals who are extremely shy or passive are also at a higher risk of creating a social networking addiction.
B. Transition paragraph
1. Summary / conclusion (2 marks): In summary, emotional disturbance is the cause of social networking addiction.
2. Transitional sentence (2 marks): With these in mind, many effects can occur. Therefore, what are the effect of social networking addiction?
C. Topic sentence 2 (2 marks): The effect of social networking addiction is wasting time and money.
1. Supporting point 1 (2 marks): People who are addicted to social networking are surely spends too much time in front of the computer since they need to be constantly updated on what’s going on in their own network.
a. Sub-supporting point 1 (specific detail -3rd level) (2 marks): Bill Robinson (2014) indicates that since all those people are glued to their back, social networking has changed into a massive waste of time and productivity.
i. Sub-sub-supporting point 2 (specific detail – 4th level) (2 marks): When they spending much time on computer they then have the tendency to forget some of the things that need to be attended to.
2. Supporting point 2 (2 marks): Individuals who are addicted to social media are tend to waste money and lead to bankruptcy.
a. Sub-supporting point 1 (specific detail -3rd level) (2 marks): As example, if the people keep on shopping through online, gambling and gaming it will be humongous waste of money surely. It is also can destroy family relationship.
III. Conclusion
A. Restatement of the thesis statement (2 marks): It is evident that emotional disturbance is the cause of social networking addiction while wasting time and money is the effect due to this cause.
B. Suggestion/recommendation 1 (2 marks): In a nutshell, social networking is a serious issue. It can create negative effects among people. Therefore, it is important to limit the uses of social networking sites and get your priorities straight.
THE END