To patch, bond, seal, and repair? Or not to patch, bond, seal, and repair? That is the question. Hi. I’m Zane, and today I will show you whether or not Flex Tape works, and the trailer for the 3rd and final Zane’s Cringy Flex Tape. So… does flex tape work? To find out the answer to this, and other pressing questions, I will be doing a test on a plastic bin and a boat to see if flex tape really does work.
First I will talk about the amazing claims that Phil Swift makes on the Flex Tape webpage. “FLEX TAPE® is a super strong, rubberized, waterproof tape that can patch, bond, seal and repair virtually everything!” “FLEX TAPE® is specially formulated with a thick, flexible, rubberized backing that conforms to any shape or object!” “FLEX TAPE® can be applied hot or cold, wet or dry, even underwater!” “FLEX TAPE® instantly seals out water, air and moisture to create a super strong, flexible, watertight barrier!” “FLEX TAPE® is extra wide (4”, 8” & 12”) to quickly cover large cracks, gaps and holes!” “FLEX TAPE® is UV resistant, environmentally friendly, VOC-free and has a wide temperature range so it can be used in extreme weather conditions!” (“The Official Site – Flex Seal ® – #1 Patch, Bond, Seal and …”)
Wow. According to this, Flex Tape is the most awesome thing on planet earth. And it probably is. It can make a boat that was previously sawed in half completely waterproof, or so it says in the commercial. (getflexseal. “FLEX TAPE® Commercial.” YouTube, YouTube, 31 Jan. 2017, www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xzN6FM5x_E.)
Some of my experience with flex tape involves a bathroom mirror. For starters, you may have heard about my incident with a bathroom mirror up at MOSS. Somebody thought that it was a brilliant idea to stick a plunger on a bathroom mirror. Unfortunately, the mirror started to tumble down, so I grabbed some flex tape to try and hold it up. I was only able to use a little bit, due to the fact that I didn’t have any scissors. Flex tape actually held up for about 3 hours while our field group was out exploring the natural environment. Unfortunately, it didn’t hold long enough for me to alert anybody about the mirror. So the mirror went crash. Yes, Phil, that was a lotta damage. But maybe you didn’t hear about my other experience with Flex Tape.
I was riding in a van with our church’s youth group, and the van’s A/C vents had water coming out of them. I’m not quite sure why, but It was leaking pretty badly. Thankfully, I had the brilliant idea of bringing Flex Tape along with me, and somebody else had brought scissors! So we patched, bonded, sealed, AND repaired. And it actually held up!
Flex Tape will be a great help for mankind. In my upcoming presentation, I will take a plastic bin that has a big hole in it and try to repair it with only Flex Tape. If it works, then we will attempt to repair a boat that was sawed in half with only Flex Tape. If it all works, that we will know that Flex Tape has come to save humanity once and for all.
I also am going to be presenting the trailer for Zane’s Cringy Flex Tape 3 – sure to waste my time, as well as yours. It’s filled with way too many memes, vines, and random short clips. The lousy editing and bad timing are guaranteed to make you cringe!
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Works Cited:
“FLEX TAPE™ Is a Super Strong, Rubberized, Waterproof Tape That Can Patch, Bond, Seal and Repair Virtually Everything!” Official Site – Flex Seal® Family Of Products, www.flexsealproducts.com/product/flex-tape/.
getflexseal. “FLEX TAPE® Commercial.” YouTube, YouTube, 31 Jan. 2017, www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xzN6FM5x_E.
“Download Free Video Editor Software.” Download Free Video Editor: Best Software for Video Editing., www.videosoftdev.com/free-video-editor.
crbenesch. “Billy Mays Mighty Putty Commercial.” YouTube, YouTube, 27 Mar. 2008, www.youtube.com/watch?v=nkuReA-AGa8.
“Flex Seal.” Truth In Advertising, 12 Feb. 2016, www.truthinadvertising.org/flex-seal/.
consumerreports. “Flex Seal Put to the Test | Consumer Reports.” YouTube, YouTube, 8 May 2012, www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tk6ffxE0Fhs.