My morning routine was ruined with me waking up in the middle of the day. My headache reminded of my exhaustion from the day before and the guilt of starting the day late gave me an impulse to leave the house immediately. I went to the library to visit a recent exhibition of art. It has been a while since I have visited the library on campus. I got out of my car, and I felt the warmness of the sun all over my face. Seeing all the students in rush made me uncomfortable since their haste made me think about all the work I had to do for my classes. The moment I entered to the library, it was cold and unenticing to me. Paintings were hung all over the library’s walls. Students were studying intensively at the tables right below the paintings; therefore, I hesitated to stand and observe the pieces since I wanted neither to disturb them nor be the awkward guy who stands too close to people. The paintings seemed quite ordinary. Maybe it’s because I didn’t have a chance to take a look at them thoroughly. As time goes by I set my mind to leave the library since I wasn’t touched by any of the pieces. I continued to walk towards the exit of the library until I find myself drawn to a painting.
The piece was “Heading For Nothingness” painted by Keiko Strong. In the painting, the focal point is a woman on her knees. She is perhaps in her twenties and she is inside a cave. Pure clean water pouring down on the shoulders of her. Moreover, her head is covered by a blue fabric. More clearly, the painter uses the shades of blue and green in order to represent the fabric which covers the woman’s head. At the front of the fabric, there is a shiny version of green with a perfect harmony to bring out the visual illusion. Her face is shady. There is only a tip of her nose and her lips. She wears a pale white dress but some places of her dress have a brighter tone of white. Especially, from her left shoulder until the end of her arm. The other side of her shoulder is covered by a delicate brown color. Her skin is darker on her forearm than her legs and her fingers. At the background, the cave is obscure. Rocks look like a mixture of black and watery brown and they seem cold. The water bounces off from her shoulders to the ground. When the water droplets hit the ground of the cave, they spread out in a wide pattern like little circles.
As I stand more in front of the painting, I began to think about all the women in the country of where I grow up Turkey. All of a sudden, a real life problem appeared in my mind which was about all the women who faces cultural and social pressures when they make decisions to shape their life. Emotions that this painting made me feel was strange, and I interpreted them as doleful or in other word sorrow. Every little detail in this painting helped me to make connections to the parts of my life in Turkey. The deeper I observed this painting the more emotions I felt all over my chest. These strong connections between me and the painting had a huge impact on me. It cast a spell on me. How could it be possible to just look at a picture and think about my mother? Perhaps, knowing all the tough times my mother went through, the pressures she faced, or simply the affection I feel for her made me feel the sadness of the women in the painting. I’ve found myself gazing at this picture for a long time, thus the mystery of my interest for this piece was something that I had to discover.
What do I mean by cultural and social pressures that women are facing? Many Middle Eastern countries have their own cultural traditions where women dominated by men. Mostly, women don’t have a right to make her decisions to shape her life in areas such as deciding when and who to get married with or to make the decision to get an education or not. A woman in this culture has a set of obligations that she must complete. One of these obligations is marriage and having children. For instance, she is expected to be married by the ages from eighteen to her mid twenties. If she is not married by this time, people would think that something is wrong with her. It is easy for her to be judged just because she is not married. The way women choose to live their life mostly decided by a family member or they simply judged by the society just because they are women. Now to the picture, the way it’s painted by the artist is relatable. Women in the painting is on her knees and her hands cover her knees from the top. Her head was tilted down, and it was covered. The darkness of her face reflects her sadness or her sense of shame deep down. Her innocence is represented by the artist with her wearing a baggy white dress. The color of the blue on fabric is rich but cold. She is thinking but the way she looks is depressed. She also looks defeated maybe just because she can’t control her own life.
Most of the world has labelled the responsibilities of men to be the hard worker for their family, the protector guardians, the tough and indestructible ones who women can count on for constancy and survival. Women are the caregivers and are benign and motherly, taking care of the basic needs of everyone around them and rarely thinking of themselves. These gender roles have been fundamental to many cultures throughout the world, and though many individuals may disagree or rebel against them, they are still part of the traditional culture and society. In the painting, water splashes all over her body and the transparency of the white dress on her skin is original. Perhaps, water is a symbol for her tough times in life or it is representing all the burden she was carrying on her shoulders. Maybe the burden of pushing past or challenging traditions. Furthermore, she is in a cave. The lack of light meant the lack of its warming touch. Her shadow is dissolving into the surrounding darkness. The cave is damp and the only sound is flowing water. The rocks surrounded her looks as strong as a man but yet she looks alone and crushed by her responsibilities in her own world. The artist didn’t paint her full face, just a glimpse of it. Possibly to show that she feels low and wants to hide her face from everyone, from the world.
Though we do not know what exactly artist meant by painting this piece, we could assume that she wanted to reflect the difficulty of carrying cultural traditions and the pressures that women are facing throughout their life when making decisions based on these traditions. She translates the rawest human emotion into the painting. There are many women who want to get married and stay at home with their children and dedicate themselves to the necessities of their family. However, there are just as many women who want to get jobs or live in unconventional familial situations. From my perspective, this woman in this painting illustrates and reminds me these types of real life problems especially in a country where I witnessed these problems with my own eyes. For me, the artist has painted the reality of life. Society and culture have created standards for how a woman should act and live. If we continue to maintain these standards, then how is it possible for women to gain their rights and freedom?