The Girl in the Tangerine Scarf by Mohja Kahf and Hopes and Other Dangerous Pursuits by Laila Lalami are two novels that display the portrayals of women in their community and the particular issues that they face. These two novels share the same theme. The nature of these characters experiences share some similar hardships.
The Girl in the Tangerine Scarf by Mohja Kahf is about a young girl named Khadra whose parents were immigrants from Indianapolis. This novel sheds a light on Khadra growing into adolescence regarding the fact that she was grew up in a Muslim Community with a very tight knit family. Khadra’s parents became laboriously involved in the Da’wah Centre. The Da’wah Centre played a huge role in Khadra’s life as a result. Which was not always easy for a youngin like Khadra who's still struggling to find her identity. In the Muslim community they have a portray women to be submissive to their husbands. In the Da’wah community women weren’t allowed to read the Quran but men were. In a marriage women don’t really have a say in who they want to marry and what they can or cannot do. It was not “Islamic” for a woman to be divorced, especially at a young age.
When a woman becomes a wife that is the moment in their lives they are confronted with challenges because of their gender. Khadra experiences sexism when she got married to Juma. The marriage took a toll on Khadra’s life; challenging her beliefs and understanding of the Muslim community. Although overall Juma was a “good man”, She began to see how overprotective, controlling, and overly conservative he was. However, Juma also thought Khadra was going to be the perfect wife he’d always hoped for. “An observant muslim, of course, but also a modern, educated woman, not old fashioned and boring.”(222) He was also attracted to her sexually. For example, Juma tried to prevent Khadra from riding her bike because it is “un islamic”. Juma thought of Khadra as a “Arab girl, familiar with Arab customs. He hadn’t expected her to be doing things that would embarrass him.”(227) Juma was embarrassed because Khadra wanted to ride her bike; to him it wasn’t lady like. “You look ridiculous… It’s idiotic to ride a bicycle in Hijab. You look really stupid and clumsy, and clown like.”(228) Those were the shameful words he said to his wife because he disagreed with her decision. He begged her not to ride the bike. He attempts to justify himself by stating “Say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty, that they should not display their beauty and ornaments.”(228) He then assumes that the only reason she’s prolonging the argument about her riding a bike is to please her ego. “I forbid you… As your husband, I forbid you.”(230) Khadra was shocked by the fact that Juma actually said those words to her. This type of attitude coming from a man to his wife was completely foreign to her. It was not what she was used to in the Da’wah community, specifically between her parents.
At home Juma and Khadra were quite distant. Mostly because Khadra spent most of her time focusing on her school work instead of her “wifely duties” and household chores. For instance Juma interrupted Khadra while she was home doing her school work to ask her what she was going to prepare for dinner. She felt very offended by the question her husband had asked. She responded to him exclaiming “I don’t know. Why’re you asking me? Like I’m the one who’s supposed to know?… The prophet never asked his wives to do anything in the house for him.”(240-241) Growing up in the Da’wah community Khadra was socially constructed to perform a certain way when married. Certainly not the same way Juma expects her to as a wife. She typically blames the Da’wah community for preaching her flawed presumptions concerning “typical religious Muslims”. Khadra felt disrespected by the fact that Juma assumed that she should obey every order that he gives without complaining and having her own opinions. In the light of Khadra’s experiences in her marriage; her and her husband got a divorce later in the novel. Which was a result of Khadra getting an abortion that her husband did not approve of. “ … She’d been the one who wanted out… She gave Juma back the wedding gold in its velvet box.”(252)
Furthermore, In the novel Hopes and Other Dangerous Pursuits by Laila Lalami; the author discusses how women are portrayed and the difficult issues they face. This novel displays women to be patient, obedient, and emphasize that they should sacrifice their lives in a marriage especially when their are children involved. “A woman must know how to handle her husband.”(53) Laila Lalami shed’s a light on the story of a woman named Halima who had an abusive, alcoholic man as her husband. Halima was unhappy. Her daily life was quite stressful, she spends her days working then goes home to prepare dinner for her children and her miserable, unreliable husband who abuses her daily because of his drinking problems. She often stresses because her husband spends all his money on alcohol. Another reason Halima was stressed and bothered by her life at the moment was because she felt as if there was nothing she could’ve done to get out of the marriage. Mainly because it is very difficult for a woman to benefit from a divorce. To get a divorce is rather difficult as well. When his money is finished he steals hers in order to support his bad habit. “He drank the rent money… She was twenty-nine, but the dark patches on her face and the stoop in her shoulders made her look much older.”(53) Because of the stress and heartache Halima had to put up with it showed in her appearance. Halima desperately wanted to get a divorce. She was forced to make unfair/ unreasonable choices when it came to taking care of her children and pleasing her unreasonable husband. After Hamila finished preparing her family’s food. She was indecisive on what to do. “If she served the tagine now, the food would be cold by the time he got home and he might be upset. If she waited, the children would be late for school and he might still be upset.”(60) In this situation she hardly knew how to react because she did not want to upset her husband. On the other hand she was avoiding to look weak in front of her children. Halima had no say in this marriage if she tried to voice her opinion or even offer a suggestion in a tone her husband did not like; she was taking a risk of getting beat and humiliated by him. “ … And all for what? We’ll be stuck here till the day we die. Soon we’ll be begging at the door of the mosque on Friday.”(62) Her husband certainly did not like that tone. “ … only felt it when it hit her face and knocked her to the side, the air suddenly out of her lungs.”(62) The lifestyle Halima lived in was unhealthy not only for her but also for her children. Halima began to question God. She reflects on the struggles she’d been through. Later in the novel, In spite of this predicament, Halima overcame her fear of moving on and making a better life for her and her children. She took the risk of sailing on a boat with other citizens of Casablanca to escape their problems. Even though her plan didn’t fall through, she was still determined to make a change in her life. She did. She finally got a divorce, and found a way to provide for her and her children. “She enjoyed working for herself and was good at sales. Things were working out after all, she thought”(122)
In conclusion, although these women faced dreadful challenges because of their gender. They manage to flout the typical ideas of how an Arab American woman should act in marriage. These women decided to change the “norm” in their traditional practices and their particular guidelines. After overcoming their struggles, they took a more enlightened attitude in various essential ways.