Communication Skills Essay
Communication is a fundamental component of life as humans. Communication involves listening, responding and considering intercultural and interpersonal barriers, awareness, interpretation and perception. Moreover, many communication skills are vital to the effectiveness and appropriate care for a woman as a midwife. Midwives must communicate with the women in their care, peers and colleagues. This essay will focus on the communication skills that are important to practice as a midwife, and that I will strive to develop. It will explore skills such as showing empathy and refraining from detachment, being aware of polarising in extremes, using respectful and supportive language and listening actively and compassionately. Subsequently, I have received feedback from my sister whom I communicate regularly with, as to how affectively and appropriately I use these skills currently and which areas need development. I will reflect and interpret this feedback and explain how I can improve these skills to enhance my future career as a midwife.
Communicating with empathy is reacting and considering emotions of others, and is extremely important in developing a relationship (Powell & Roberts, 2017). As a midwife, it is essential that I empathise and resist from naturally detaching from personal relationships and conversations with women in my care. According to Beebe and Beebe and Redmond (2016), being “other orientated” involves investing time and energy into a relationship and being sensitive to the emotions of another. Empathy allows trusting, meaningful conversations and research has proven that patients whom feel better psychosocially and psychologically endure better health outcomes (Halpern, 2003). Allowing myself to show emotion promotes the woman to feel safe, comfortable and confident. Additionally, it is important not to detach from a conversation, relationship or situation with a woman, as showing no emotion and reassuring information in a generic way and disregarding context can be detrimental. According to a study investigated by Halpern (2003), it is important to communicate within context, as generic, blunt, assertive tones are affective for some, for many, gentle, emotional, reassuring language is more successful.
Feedback from my sister suggested that I empathise and often take on the emotions of friends, family and acquaintances and strangers. As a student midwife, my studies involve maintenance of relationships with women and following them through their pregnancy within a continuity of care model. Continuity of care has proven to benefit the woman and promote positive birth outcomes (Dahlberg, 2012) and it is something that I consciously make an effort to achieve. She implied that through the sensitive topics in midwifery that I have been presented with, such as miscarriage and stillbirth, I am able to empathise with these women and support them, without detaching myself from these situations in apprehension. However, I am aware that these situations often take over my own mind and affect me outside practice and context and my interpersonal communication. I will consider this and aim to personally reflect and journal this experience for myself, as it is extremely important that I empathise with others and take care of my own mental health, although I am competent in showing empathy to others.
To communicate effectively and appropriately as a midwife it is vital to be aware of polarising in extremes. As cited by Beebe and Beebe and Redmond (2016), polarising essentially is exclaiming a situation or occurrence in an “either- or perspective”. In midwifery, there is not always a definitive answer or response to a situation and many aspects must be considered in a contextual perspective. Furthermore, this form of communication can be detrimental to the perception of myself and those I am developing a relationship with. It is essential to refrain from polarising in extremes as a midwife as both extreme, negative terms and words, particularly throughout birth can powerfully and severely affect the confidence of the woman. Additionally, through the media and opinions of family and peers, women are often caught in the dispute of whether to use no medication, or to use it from the beginning of labour, though there many options (Barber, 2014). Often women are unaware that there does not have to be two extreme routes but various alternatives that can be considered and that these decisions are transitional and open for change based on her aspirations.
After asking for feedback from my sister on how effectively I communicate by avoiding being polarising, I was not surprised to hear that I often let my emotions exaggerate my communication. It is essential that I develop my skills of communication to avoid polarising, as it can be disadvantageous to my relationships and partnerships with women in the clinical area. I am conscious that when I am deeply excited or disappointed, I often ignore all negative or middle ground ideologies. This often hinders my judgment, understanding and interpretation in many aspects of my life, and I often need to be reassured that there are many options when I am faced with an issue. To counteract this, it is essential that I develop this communication skill to benefit my career and relationships. As suggested by Beebe and Beebe and Redmond (2016), I will consciously avoid using language that supports either/or choices when communicating with others and will ask and reassure them of the variety of “middle ground” options they have.
Verbal and non-verbal communication is the essence of conversing with all humans in life. As a midwife, it is essential that I communicate and respond with women and their families with the intent of continuing to be respectful and supportive. Respectful language involves refraining from sexist terms and hate speech, such as unintentionally using words that offend or disrespect a race, culture, age, class etc. In order to empower women, supportive avoids labelling and gender roles (Beebe and Beebe & Redmond, 2016). Additionally, supportive language promotes positive dialogue and conversation. It is essential that ethnic, racial or demeaning biased language be avoided by speaking about positive, supportive topics, promoting a safer environment. Furthermore, responding to disrespectful instances and language with appropriate non-verbal gestures that display an open mind are essential in effective communication also.
After receiving feedback from my sister, there were various aspects of responding that I show strength in, and need to develop. Firstly, my sister pointed that I promote, as cited in Beebe and Beebe and Redmond (2016) that I “dialogue rather than debate”. She explained that I effectively use non-verbal and verbal communication to respond appropriately to others. Exemplified when I was presented with a heated discussion with a grandparent. Though they were aggressive, homophobic and racist, I replied with respectful, supportive language that avoided bias such as “I understand where you are coming from” and “thank you for being honest with me”. Non-verbally I also maintained my composure, and upheld eye contact, nodded my head and allowed both myself and him to take turns explain our opinion- all essential non-verbal behaviours to enhance the conversation an to communicate effectively (Carteret, 2011). To ensure this is a common practice as a midwife, I will continue to paraphrase and approach these conversations with sophisticated, appropriate dialogue.
Finally, as a midwife, listening appropriately is essential to responding effectively. As explained by Bebbe and Beebe and Pearson, there are two types of listening, compassionately and actively. Compassionate listening involves open and accepting language and avoidance of judgmental or defensive language. Furthermore, active listening involves physically and mentally being invested in a conversation and this allows understanding on both sides (Beebe & Beebe & Redmond, 2016).
Additionally, my sister explained that though I appeared to remain calm throughout the heated discussion with my grandparents, she noticed I was struggling to listen. Although I was evidently acceptingly listening to the views of my grandfather, I struggled to actively listen. As cited by Devito (2013) listening can be difficult and it is certain that at some point, there will be lack of understanding, attention span and responding with judgement. It is crucial that I learn to appropriately and successfully listen to the women, colleagues and families involved throughout my career. To improve my skills, Lightbody and Whaite (2013) suggest that “non-academic” interactions outside of the workplace benefit the communication skills as work. Therefore, I will continue to reflect and pursue the art of listening to benefit my career.
It is essential that I consider all aspects of communication in my future career as a midwife and every day as a human in the community. I will maintain my skills of being empathetic, improve that of polarising in extremes, as well as respond with supportive and respectful language and listen both actively and compassionately. These skills are extremely important in being a successful midwife inside and out of the workplace.
References:
Barber, K. (2012). The complexity of decision making in midwifery: A case study. British Journal of Midwifery. doi: 20(4): 289-94
Beebe, S & Beebe, S & Redmond, M (2016). Interpersonal communication: relating to others. (7th ed). Harlow, Essex: Pearson Education Limited 2014
Carteret, M. (2011) Non-verbal behaviour in cross cultural interactions. Retrieved from http://www.dimensionsofculture.com/2010/11/non-verbal-behavior-in-cross-cultural-interactions/
Dahlberg, U and Aune, I. (2012) The woman’s birth experience- the effect of interpersonal relationships and continuity of care. Midwifery 29(4), 407-415. doi: https://doi.org/10.1016/j.midw.2012.09.006
Devito, J. (2013) Listening in interpersonal communication. The interpersonal Communication Book 13(4). Retrieved from https://ereadings.cdu.edu.au/eserv/cdu:59560/ER09548.pdf
Halpern, J. (2003) What is clinical empathy?. Journal of General Internal Medicine 18(8), 670-674. doi: 10.1046/j.1525-1497.2003.21017
Powell, P and Roberts, J. (2017). Situational determinants of cognitive, affective and compassionate empathy in naturalistic digital interactions. Computers in Human Behaviour 68. 137-148. doi: https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chb.2016.11.024
Stone, G and Lightbody, M and Whait, R. (2013). Developing accounting students listening skills: barriers, opportunities and an integrated stakeholder approach. Accounting education 22(2), 168-192. doi: http://dx.doi.org/10.1080/09639284.2013.766015