Self-Reflection Essay
I have learned a lot from this incident and know that it is something that will not happen again. I let stress and peer pressure get to me, overwhelmed by the college culture which I was not used to along with the stress of keeping my grades where I wanted them to be. This will not happen again. My town back home on Long Island made alcohol seem like it’s not a big deal. I was wrong. Like others around me I fell to the use of alcohol because I thought that was the right way to calm my feelings rather than learning to stay calm in natural ways. There were not a lot of sources for comfort for me at that time so I turned to alcohol.
I apologize for my actions and I understand that by having alcohol in my dorm I just add to the problem of a growing drug and alcohol culture on college campuses. I know a lot of kids whose dad’s and uncles became alcoholics after losing their jobs and I don’t want to add to the feeling that drinking is the right way to deal with tough situations. I have found that there are many much more effective ways to deal with stress. I try to talk to my parents more and cut out people who may be bad influences.
When I bought that 6 pack of beer and brought it in to my freshman dorm, I did not realize the seriousness of the decision I was making. I thought it was a normal way to handle stress. I did not realize the mistake that I was making. It was something that I saw others doing and I thought that it would be fun and help me feel calmer. It did not help me to feel less stress, it only added to a list of problems I was trying to escape from.
I am feeling a lot less stress now than I was at the time. Speaking to my parents after the incident allowed me to begin having open conversations with them and made me realize how important it is for me to deal with problems head on rather than avoiding them. I am really enjoying my classes and rather than allowing myself to be overwhelmed by the work I am figuring out how to manage my time better, spreading work out over the full extent of time that I am given to work on it rather than leaving things to the last minute. This is decreasing a lot of my stress and focusing on my school work there is less temptation for partying and things like that.
Drinking serves to dull one’s mind and take them away from the present moment. Neither of those are things that I want to do anymore and after this situation I have realized the seriousness of my past decisions. I understand that Cornell’s code of conduct is there to protect students. I had not formerly understood how seriously they take drinking in the dorm, but now that I do I know it is not something that can be easily gotten away with, and not something I would try again. I know that the code is there to help me and that Cornell will not condone underage drinking on its campus and is only trying to help me, along with other students, by enforcing this rule. I understand that there are other ways to have fun than getting drunk.
I understand that underage drinking is illegal because it is a substance that only impedes learning and is not safe or healthy.
I understand that the decision to bring those beers into my dorm affected me negatively and took away from my college experience. I understand that the impaired judgement that drinking causes could have led to further bad mistakes as it is harder to make rational decisions while drunk. I regret doing something so dumb that the Cornell Police Department had to get involved. That’s never good.
I wish there was some way I can take back my actions but since I can’t all I can do is learn from them. From this point forward I will understand to a much greater extent the seriousness of the Cornell Code of Conduct. I will refer to the Code for future reference and be sure not to break any of its rules again. This was a very transformative experience for me and made me realize that I am not above the rules of the university and that those who think they are get punished accordingly.
I will prevent an experience like this from happening again by first understanding the seriousness of my offense and the fact that while going to Cornell I cannot perform actions which are prohibited in the Code of Conduct. Secondly, I will focus on my academics rather than on partying and understand that just because others are drinking underage does not mean that it is normal or okay to use. Thirdly, I will manage my stress in better, more healthy ways,
I am incredibly sorry for the trouble I have caused the college and I will not cause trouble like this again. When there are so many others drinking underage, it is hard to say no but I have learned how important it is to do so and will not make the same mistake again. I know that I could have caused harm to myself and others by bringing alcohol into the room and putting them at disciplinary risk. .
It is hard to stay focused on school work when hungover because you become more focused on the headache and grogginess than what’s going on in class. I don’t think it is a comfortable way to feel and although it momentarily dulls feelings of stress it does not solve any of those problems. There is no point to me in merely impairing my mind and that is not my idea of fun. I regret my actions because they put others at risk, hurt me academically and physically, and broke the Code of Conduct. I am very proud to go to Cornell University and I would not want to do anything to tarnish the colleges reputation again.
Big changes are always stressful, such as moving out of one’s home and attending college. When I went to college I often saw people around me get dangerously drunk to cope with that stress, others who were feeling stress for the same reasons. The motivation to drink heavily came from the want to fit in with others around me and understand their shared experiences along with a want for an easy fix to a feeling which everyone leaving home deals with. The only productive way to deal with this stress is by coping with it, by allowing oneself to feel homesick and afraid, and to know that those feelings will diminish. The longer that I have been at Cornell the more those feelings have diminished and the more that it feels like a second home. I am managing my work better so that it does not overwhelm me, which has decreased my stress immensely.
I wish I could reverse the events of that night, but since I cannot I will instead focus on the future. I understand the impact that my actions have not just on myself, but on all the people around me. My family was affected by my actions, my friends, and my school. My parents don’t trust me the way that they used to, and this has made me sure that I do not want to do something like this again. My friends were affected both by the immediate risk I put them in with my actions as well as by how upset I was after this incident, which I think at least persuaded them not to try marijuana. This has been an incredibly hard experience for me, but a life changing one
It was hard to come to terms with the fact that all of the turmoil that this has caused was brought on by my actions, but I understand that it was. I do not want to make myself, my family, or my friends have to deal with a situation like this ever again. This put a dent into a freshman year that I was already really enjoying, and I do not want to hurt any more of my college experiences with drinking problems.
I have seen alcohol negatively affect many people. I’ve seen many of my friends’ dads as well as an uncle fall into alcoholism after losing their job or a loved one. It is like they can’t live without it. It controls every aspect of their but a lot of them never thought they had a problem. Both their family lives and physical health were negatively impacted by non-stop drinking. A lot of their money goes straight to the liquor store. It’s really sad to see them not even consider asking for help. I do not want to go down a path similar to theirs so I will cut down on my drinking and not be afraid to use the many help resources afforded to me by the university.
Alcohol can derail people’s lives in the same way that other drugs do. Someone who is happy and successful does not need to drink because they do not need to dull their mind. I do not plan on being someone who needs to smoke marijuana to be happy. I never want to be reliant on anything but myself for happiness. That’s just not fair to me or to anyone else. In the end I am thankful that I had this wake up call to show me how wrong underage drinking really is. I have seen people’s educations and lives be ruined by alcohol. It is a dangerous drug. I am sorry if this incident negatively affected the reputation of the school in any way.
Peer pressure is the reason why many people drink heavily, and I think this affected me immediately because I didn’t really understand how serious drinking was at the time. I drank a bit in high school but I didn’t realize how serious and detrimental it is before I got to college. but I have learned that it is not something that should ever be abused on a college campus. I am sorry for the trouble that I have caused with my actions, but I have learned a lot from this incident.