Carissa Munive
Professor Flowers
English 2130
09 November 2018
The way to a man's heart is through his stomach: Women roles in the 19th Century
As asserted by the Victorian novelist Mary Elizabeth Braddon, “Surely a pretty woman never looks prettier than when making tea." Separated by a century, both Barbara Welter and Fanny Fern examine the notion of a “true woman" of the nineteenth-century in their respective writings “The Cult of True Womanhood” and a “Hint to Young Wives.” Both Welter and Fern challenge the position of nineteenth-century women in the spheres of domesticity, submission, and purity in America.
Welter and Fern were both feminists who supported and wrote on the equality of the sexes in their time. The Cult of True Womanhood was a name given by historians to nineteenth century gender ideology. This philosophy created a lens in which a woman’s role in society centuries ago could be viewed. Welter, a feminist, was credited as the first to use the term “Cult of True Womanhood” which she wrote as an expression of her disapproval of these ideas. Similarly, Fanny Fern also a feminist writer who lived in the “True Womanhood” era disapproved of this idea. She expressed her disapproval in her many sarcastic and witty writings that encompassed women roles.
Firstly, Welter through her writings categorized and described women roles in the nineteenth century. One of the qualities that Barbara Welter examines in detail in her 1966 essay, “The Cult of True Womanhood” was domesticity. Welter states “A wife should occupy herself "only with domestic affairs-wait till your husband confides to you those of a high importance-and do not give your advice until he asks for it”. In the nineteenth century a woman was expected to be domestic and to solely attend to her housework and family. She was judged by her husband and society by the state of her home (Fitts). Her role in her private sphere consisted of cleaning, cooking, and caring for her family. It was understood that the act of being domestic and staying within her private sphere was practically God ordained. Her only affairs were to be family or God related otherwise anything else outside of it would be to demanding to her fragile self. Partaking in any social activity outside of religion was condemned since it would disturb her domestic sphere and her role. Her upmost responsibility was to the home a cheerful and a peaceful place which would keep men away from the evils of the outer world.
Additionally, a woman was imagined to have a vigorous dinner prepared and ready to greet her fatigued husband with a kiss at the door but also expected to be presentable upon his arrival. Fern retorts with disapproval “Poor Little Innocent Fool! She imagines that’s the way to preserve his affection.” Fanny Fern expresses her displeasure of this idea in her “Hint to Young wives” in which she mocks her neighbor for frantically running around making sure everything is perfect upon her husband’s arrival after work. Domesticity was highly valued, and a woman that upheld this idea was praised. The woman of the house was responsible for maintaining the order and creating a place of tranquility for her family. However, Fern stresses you should not be your husband’s servant and that one should not give him too much love either.
Countless times women have read in Ephesians in which Paul admonishes “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.”(English Standard Version, Eph. 5:22-24). This writing in the New Testament is one of the many writings that women read in the 19thcentury and at the present time. The traits of Submissiveness, obedience and a kind spirit were vital to adhere to as a dignified true woman of God. Aside from the pressure of being submissive through religious writings women in America were pressured to be submissive through magazines and books meant for enjoyment. Welter observes “Woman, in the cult of True Womanhood,' were presented by the women's magazines, gift annuals and religious literature of the nineteenth century, was the hostage in the home”.
The Magazine “Godey's lady book” was an American women's magazine that was published in the 1800’s”. It was a popular and recognized magazine among women that offered anything from advice to knitting pattern this platform was a significant influence among woman who molded and encouraged them to conform to these ideologies. Men were to be movers, and doers‐‐the actors in life. Women were to be passive bystanders, submitting to fate, to duty, to God, and to men(Lavender). This was a typical pattern throughout a woman’s life she was to be submissive at an early age beginning with her father and eventually submissive to her husband.
Fern Mocked “but the very second he finds out (or thinks he does) that he has possession of every inch of your heart, and no neutral territory — he will turn on his heel and march off whistling "Yankee Doodle!".” Fern implied that women were the property of their husband and if the husband believed he had possession and complete control over his wife he would ultimately underestimate her. Women were denied authority and autonomy; they were the submissive responders (Kelley). Fern didn’t agree with a woman being submissive since she felt that a man was incapable of loving a woman for her worth and that a woman was merely a level above a servant to him.
“The marriage night was the single great event of a woman's life, when she bestowed her greatest treasure upon her thus- Purity was as essential as piety to a young woman, its absence as un- natural and unfeminine” detailed by Welter. If a woman was not a virgin at marriage she was not considered a “true woman” essentially not a woman at all. One of the primary qualities a man looked for in a woman was that she was pure and a virgin. Women themselves took this notion with pride. It is also stated that a woman was not to feel any sensual or sexual passion since it was conceived as impure however men were not held to the same standard. Colonial American culture made firm distinctions about what was appropriate for each sex to do and took for granted the subordination of women (Kerber). Any sexual advances from men were the responsibility of a women to decline. A man was to thank a women for stopping him from taking her purity away from her. Even the literature a woman read advised a woman that if she allowed herself to be seduced by a man she would pay for her sin.
According to Welter, “Real women often felt they did not live up to the ideal of True Womanhood: some of them blamed themselves, some challenged the standard.” Women were held up to such a high standard in this ideology that many women felt like a failure for not excelling in them. Fanny Fern and Barbara Welter were one like the many women who challenged these ides that “The Cult of True Womanhood” were composed of. Within their literary writings, both Welter and Fern voiced their views in the spheres of domesticity, submission, and purity in America. They both encouraged for women to be measured as the equal of men and not their inferior.
Works Cited
Catherine J. Lavender, ʺNotes on The Cult of Domesticity and True Womanhood,ʺ Prepared for Students in HST 386: Women in the City, Department of History, The College of Staten Island/CUNY (1998), https://csivc.csi.cuny.edu/history/files/lavender/386/truewoman.pdf
Fern, Fanny. “A Law More Nice than Just.” The Norton Anthology of American Literature, by Robert S. Levine, W. W. Norton & Company., 2017, pp. 914–915.
Fern, Fanny. “Hints to Young Wives.” Georgia State Online Courses, gastate.view.usg.edu/d2l/le/content/1673242/viewContent/28654157/View.
Fitts, RK. “The Archaeology of Middle-Class Domesticity and Gentility in Victorian Brooklyn.” HISTORICAL ARCHAEOLOGY, vol. 33, no. 1, 1999, pp. 39–62. EBSCOhost, ezproxy.gsu.edu/login?url=http://search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=edswah&AN=000078881700004&site=eds-live&scope=site.
Kelley, Mary. “Beyond the Boundaries.” Journal of the Early Republic, vol. 21, no. 1, 2001, pp. 73–78. JSTOR, JSTOR, www.jstor.org/stable/3125096.
Kerber, Linda K. “Separate Spheres, Female Worlds, Woman's Place: The Rhetoric of Women's History.” The Journal of American History, vol. 75, no. 1, 1988, pp. 9–39. JSTOR, JSTOR, www.jstor.org/stable/1889653.
English Standard Version, Ephesians . 5:22-24)
Braddon, Mary Elizabeth Lady Audley's Secret 1862.