Identifying who is being bullied and who is being a bully can be a tough challenge. According to stopbullying.gov, the victims who are at most risk for being bullied at children who are considered different, such as having an irregular weight, are weak, have depression, anxiety, or low self-esteem; are not considered popular and have few friends, and children who don’t seem to get along socially with others. On the same site, the children who are at the biggest risk of being a bully are basically the opposite: they are considered popular with peers, but can also have depression, anxiety, or low self-esteem. Potential bullies also have issues with aggression and frustration, do not have the necessary parental involvement at home, do not think kindly of others, do not follow rules, have a positive viewpoint when it comes to violence, and are friends with other children who bully. The problem with identifying a bullying issue is that these factors are just based on statistics and do not cover every situation, so it’s important for teachers to recognize that students who are likely to be bullied can very well be the bully in a situation, and vice versa. That’s why it’s important to keep an eye out for the warning signs of bullying to make sure that a teacher has correctly identified who is a bully and who is being bullied.
Who are the most likely targets for being bullied? Recent studies have shown that most bully victims are a bit different the average kid. African American and Hispanic children are more likely to get bullied than their white peers. Children who are Muslim, Sikh, or Jewish are also more likely to get bullied, especially if children wear visible proclamations of their faiths, such as hijabs, yarmulkes, or turbans. LGBTQ children are at an especially high risk for bullying, and all the negative effects of bullying, including suicide, is significantly higher. Children with special needs or health concerns also have an increased risk of being bullied, and in some kinds of bullying, the actual bullying can result in death, such as forcing a child to eat something he or she is allergic to.
There are lots of warning signs for children being bullied, and it is of the upmost importance that they are identified so that the bullying can stop. Signs can include mysterious injuries and destruction or loss of property such as phones, clothes, toys, and other possessions. Eating habits can also change, such as children not eating lunch, or a child eating way too much for lunch to cope with the stress of being bullied. Students who are being bullied may not get enough sleep, or may also suffer from nightmares on a daily basis. Grades can drop significantly because it is hard for a student to concentrate, and some students may not want to come to school altogether. They may also lose their friends and go to great lengths to avoid social situations. Self-esteem drops significantly, and there is a helpless feeling that doesn’t go away. In extreme situations, students can develop symptoms of self-harm, run away from home, and even commit suicide.
It’s important to look out for signs that a child is bullying others as well. Students can get aggressive or even violent towards others, and may get into fights (either physical or verbal) with other students. Their friends may also bully others and therefore a student may need to bully others to get a sense of belonging. Students who have unexplained new possessions or money are especially suspicious. Teachers need to watch out for students who get detention or set to the principal frequently, as well as students who don’t accept responsibility for their actions and therefore blame everything and everyone else for their actions.
Now a lot of teachers are wondering, if the bullying is so bad, why aren’t the kids rushing to tell the teachers? As it turns out, there are a lot of reasons why students are reluctant to spill the beans. For one, bullying takes away a feeling of being able to cope, and students may feel helpless and weak, and want to get their feeling of security back. Students may also not want to admit that the bullying is a problem in order to not feel weak or stupid in front of adults they respect. The same aspect applies to friends; kids who are bullied may not want to lose their friends as a result, and if that happens, they may become isolated and lonely. The worst reason is that if a bully gets in trouble, they can, and often will, retaliate with greater force. No one wants to tell the teacher that a bully called him names when the only reaction is he gets a broken nose as well.
Bullying has negative effects on all parties involved, from the bullies to the victims, and even the bystanders. Kids who get bullied have a higher risk for mental health conditions, such as depression and anxiety, and the scary part is that those problems can last for the rest of the kids’ lives. Physical health problems emerge as well, which can lead to a student missing school a lot more often. Connected to the first two problems is that there is a sharp decrease in grades, and students may stop caring altogether about grades. A very scary side effect is that kids who are bullied may retaliate in violent ways, as according to stopbullying.gov, 12 out of 15 school shooting cases were the result of the shooters being bullied as a result.
The students who bully often have problems of their own as well. Students who bully have a much greater risk of abusing drugs, such as alcohol and tobacco as well as other illegal drugs, than those who don’t bully. They are also more likely to get into fights and other violent activities, and a lot of bullies wind up committing crimes later in life and going to jail. Bullies also tend to be convicted of sexual assault and abuse towards their peers, and they start having sex a lot earlier in life.
Bystanders actually experience a lot of the same symptoms that victims experience. There is a higher chance that they start experimenting with drugs, such as alcohol, tobacco, and illegal drugs, and there is also a higher chance they may develop a mental illness later in life, such as anxiety or depression. There’s even a higher chance that they miss or even skip school.
Long ago, bullying among peers usually ended once the victim left school. Thanks to social media and the internet, bullying can happen anywhere in the world, even in the comfort of the home. This new type of bullying, named cyberbullying, has made a rise throughout the years because of websites and apps like Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Snapchat. It’s also common through texting on phones, instant messaging through a website or app, and even just email. What’s especially concerning is that it’s persistent, because it can go on for months or even years, it can have long lasting consequences for the victim, and because it’s not performed in public eye, teachers and parents have a hard time recognizing when it happens. Another scary concept is that while regular bullying is to be handled because it is required by the law, cyberbullying doesn’t usually fall under these laws. Therefore, it is up to the school or the local district to take action, although the state may be able to take action if the cyberbullying is harming a student’s academic performance. According to the School Crime Supplement, about 21% of students experience a form of cyberbullying during their academic years. Examples of cyberbullying can be posting hurtful comments or rumors, threating to harm someone or encouraging suicide on social media, impersonating someone on social media, being racist, classist, a bigot, or homophobic on social media, building entire websites or webpages to humiliate someone, or doxing (finding out someone’s private information and posting it on the internet for the whole world to see). Cyberbullying can have the same effects on someone as regular bullying, but the suicide rate can be a bit higher than usual.
What should a teacher do if the bullying is happening right now and he or she can see it? First and foremost, stop the bullying immediately, according to Tolerance.org. A teacher should then respond according to the district rules concerning bullying. That includes supporting the victim and making sure they are okay, explaining to bystanders how to react in a bullying situation, and make sure to deal out punishments to bullies immediately. It’s important to notify the parents of both parties as soon as possible, and make sure to schedule a follow up meeting about the incident.
However, there are important things to know about what not to do in a bullying incident. First, some teachers may confuse bullying with conflict, and that is almost never the case. Bullying is much more serious and treating it as something less serious only insults the victim. Peer meditation, while it sounds like a good idea, has no proven benefits and actually just makes the power balance between bully and victim even worse. Group therapy fails for the same reasons as peer mediation and can intensify antisocial behavior.
What can a teacher do to prevent bullying in the classroom? First, teachers should teach students what exactly bullying is. Teachers can encourage students to stand up to a bully, how to report bullying to a teacher, parent, or other trusted adult, and general tips of how to stay safe. Another tactic is to make sure that communication between students and teachers is open. It’s important to not just talk about bullying, teachers and parents need to talk about other subjects as well, so that students feel comfortable talking to them if there is a problem.