In Joyce Carol Oates’ “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?”, the reader is introduced to a character by the name of Connie who is a fifteen-year-old girl finding her way through a difficult stage of adolescence. She is faced with many issues between her and her family as well as her social life outside of her home. Oates uses Connie’s situation to help drive home the lessons about the difficulties that female adolescents experience, fantasy versus reality, and the absence of authority.
Connie’s concerns are common for an adolescent female: Obsessed with her appearance, hangs out with friends, flirts with boys, and enjoys listening to music. At the beginning of this short story, Connie explains her relationship with her mother to be unhealthy. Her mother always makes comments about Connie’s looks and constantly compares Connie to her older sister, June. Her mother makes comments such as: ‘“Stop gawking at yourself. Who are you? You think you’re so pretty?” … “Why don’t you keep your room clean like your sister? How’ve you got your hair fixed–what the hell stinks? Hair spray? You don’t see your sister using that junk.”’ (Oates 126). Oates uses repetition in these lines to show the reader how Connie’s mother constantly criticizes her. The reader is meant to interpret these lines in a nagging, humiliating tone to help understand how harsh Connie’s mother can be towards her daughter and how unhealthy their relationship is. There is clearly a lack of authority in their household. This is important because it plays a role in Connie’s split personality. At home, she hides her sexuality and flirtatious looks to avoid being scolded by her judgmental family. Connie’s other personality is seen when she goes out. At school and when she hangs out with her friends, her mannerisms are different. Connie knows that boys find her attractive so when she is out, she dresses, talks, and walks differently. Oates states, “Everything about her had two sides to it, one for home and one for anywhere that was not home” (Oates 126). The lack of parental authority in her life and the excess amount of trust that her mother has in her allows her to live this split life without being punished. I believe the author chose the title “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?” because those are the questions that Connie probably receives from her mother before she goes out and after she comes home. These questions are simple and do not ask the specifics of what Connie does when she goes out which allows her to easily deceive her mother. Parents should always question their kids to keep them safe and make sure they are making the right decisions when they are out with friends.
Connie’s split personality separates her fantasy from her reality. Her reality is her home personality and her fantasy is when she goes out. When she is home, she is miserable and introverted and fantasizes about her social life. However, when she is with her peers, she feels confident, sexy, and somewhat invincible. When Connie’s family leaves her home alone for the day to go to a family barbeque she is free to do whatever she wants. The line between fantasy and reality begins to blur when her reality of sitting out in the yard and then in her bedroom get flushed out by fantasies of boys and music, her two favorite topics. Oates uses strong and descriptive imagery to show the reader how passionate Connie is about boys and music. When she is sitting in the yard, Oates states: “Connie sat with her eyes closed in the sun, dreaming and dazed with the warmth about her as if this were a kind of love, the caresses of love, and her mind slipped over onto thoughts of the boy she had been with the night before…and when she opened her eyes she hardly knew where she was…” (Oates 128). Oates uses this to express Connie’s adolescent personality and how easily her mind switches to thoughts of boys. This same tactic is used by Oates when she says, “She went inside and turned on the radio to drown out the quiet…And Connie paid close attention herself, bathed in a glow of slow-pulsed joy that seemed to rise mysteriously out of the music itself and lay languidly about the airless little room” (Oates 128). The selective diction and attention to detail about Connie’s thoughts and actions by Oates shows the reader the current mental state that she is in. Oates strategically does this to help develop the rising action–when Arnold Friend shows up to Connie’s house.
Connie is described to be in a sort of euphoric state immediately before she hears a car pull up to her house. After Connie hears the car, Oates states, “Her heart began to pound and her fingers snatched at her hair, checking it, and she whispered, “Christ, Christ,” wondering how she looked.” (Oates 129). It is ironic how Connie acts when Arnold Friend (a stranger) pulls in her driveway because usually a person who is home alone would not immediately be concerned with how well their hair looks when an unknown car randomly parks in their driveway. The dialogue between Arnold Friend and Connie is very awkward to say the least. Connie speaks in an uninterested, nervous tone in the beginning of their altercation while Arnold speaks in a calm, flirtatious tone. Arnold acts as if Connie should’ve expected his visit, meanwhile Connie doesn’t know what he is talking about. For example, ‘“I ain’t late, am I?” he said. “Who the hell do you think you are?” Connie said.”’ (Oates 129). This is a creepy way for Arnold to start a conversation. Oates does this to clarify Arnold’s personality. As the conversation continues, Arnold becomes more and more creepy with the things he says and Connie becomes skeptical. For instance, ‘“Just for a ride, Connie sweetheart.” “I never said my name was Connie,” she said. “But I know what it is. I know your name and all about you, lots of things.”’ (Oates 131). Arnold Friend seems to know way too much about Connie’s life. Oates’ choice of words and tone for Arnold progressively gets more disturbing and makes the reader feel doubtful about his true intentions. Oates’ strategic dialogue for Arnold and Connie’s conversation was crucial because most of the drama that occurs throughout the plot is verbal, not physical. The take home message from this is simply don’t talk to or trust strangers because dangerous people could be hidden underneath an image of a nice person.
The plot hits a climax when Arnold threatens to harm Connie’s family if she didn’t go out into the car with him. Arnold says, “‘This is how it is, honey: you’ll come out and we’ll drive away, have a nice ride. But if you don’t come out we’re gonna wait till your people come home and then they’re all going to get it.”’ (Oates 135). This statement shows Arnold’s true colors and proves to Connie that she is in danger. It is the peak of Arnold’s threats and it forces Connie to decide between her safety or the safety of her family. The plot concludes abruptly without an explanation of Connie’s decision leaving it up to the reader to decide her fate.
Joyce Carol Oates uses several different tactics and literary devices to uncover different lessons that were hidden throughout this story. The difficulties that an adolescent female experiences are discussed early in the story. Also, the importance of parental authority in a teens life is brought up by Oates. The design of the plot makes the tone begin as sympathetic then gets more serious and violent and the abrupt ending leaves the reader feeling uneasy.